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Psychology of relationships

Psychogenesis of Spousal Compatibility – How You Can Save Your Marriage From Divorce

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Psychogenesis of spousal compatibility is a phenomenon that takes place in marriages. The concept is simple, and goes something like this: Each spouse wants the other to be with them, wants the relationship to work. When that doesn’t happen, and the other person does not reciprocate, then the level of “psychogenesis” of spousal compatibility disappears, and the marriage breaks down. This does not happen all the time, but it can.

 

What does this mean for couples in long term relationships? Well, depending on the original situation, if the relationship has been going on for more than a few years, there is a good chance that there is a genuine level of spousal incompatibility that can be changed. If, however, the relationship only recently started going down the aisle, or the marriage involved young children, it may be too late. In these cases, psychogenesis of spousal compatibility has not happened, and the marriage simply will not be saved.

 

If you are in such a situation, you are probably wondering how to save your marriage. Fortunately, saving a marriage is not as hard to do as one might think. There are a number of steps you can take to improve the level of compatibility in your relationship.

 

Open up – Talk to your spouse about your problems without being critical. By the same token, talk to your spouse about the problems you have noticed in him or her. This will allow you both to find out what drives you about each other, as well as what draws you closer.

 

Change – You may have realized that you have differences of opinion with your spouse on certain issues. If this is the case, then the best way forward is for you to find out how you can compromise with your spouse. Spouses who genuinely have deep spiritual beliefs are very rarely at odds over religious or moral beliefs. Once you have found a way to compromise, psychogenesis of marriage may be on your way to saving your marriage.

 

Be more attentive to your own needs – You have to make an effort to spend more time with your spouse. Pay attention to how he or she is feeling. Find out if there is anything that sparks strong emotions in him or her. This can be the key that helps you to uncover the issues that may be causing your relationship to fall apart. You may find that you can solve these problems by talking about them or by changing your own behavior.

 

Give each other space – You have to give your spouse some breathing room as well. During a bad marriage it’s easy to blame the other person. It’s easy to feel like your problems are someone else’s fault. The truth is, the problems in your relationship are your responsibility. If you take the time to discuss this with your spouse you will learn how to better meet your needs and desires for a long and happy marriage.

 

Psychogenesis of spousal compatibility can also be accomplished by making time for the things you really enjoy in your relationship. If you two are getting along well there is no need to keep checking up on your spouse all the time. Schedule a night out once a week if you have free time. If you two are fighting all the time you may have to take the initiative and do something different. Changing your routine and setting aside some time for romance is an excellent way to create more harmony in your relationship.

 

Don’t take advantage of being together – If there has been infidelity in your relationship there is no reason to put the relationship to the backburner. Recovering from infidelity is part of growing up and your spouse should be allowed to move on with their life after the affair. Keep in mind that your spouse probably had the same expectations of you that you had of him or her. This is not a reflection of your relationship with your mate but of the nature of the affair itself. If you are focused on your own relationship, then you are defeating the purpose of recovering from the affair.

 

Don’t make threats – Do not threaten your spouse in any way. If you tell your spouse that he or she will no longer be around, this can only cause hurt feelings. Don’t call them, don’t send them gifts, and don’t even talk about it. It is in fact better to ignore the situation rather than making it worse. This will make it easier to heal the relationship and will avoid things getting worse.

 

Do not be spontaneous – Spouses should not be expected to act in a spontaneous manner. A marriage is supposed to be built upon a foundation of love and respect. If your spouse has cheated on you, then it is high time that you realized that you cannot trust your spouse in such a case and that you need to rebuild your relationship based upon respect and trust.

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